As I finalize moving out of this beat-up, poorly vented, dustbowl of an apartment, I realize how much I’ll miss this place.
A year has gone by and the rarely used pool table, the grease stain on the window screen (Craig), and the back porch that always felt like it was on the verge of collapsing will be a thing of the past as September rolls around.
So I figure the best way to honor on this sauna of an apartment is to remember it within the timeline of pop cultural phenomena that snuck their way in here, I promise there will be no Vitamin C’s “Graduation.”
• We move in, get harassed by people looking for a seemingly non-existent Dustin, and have a party with many mustaches. A terrifying photo appears:
• Drive, and more importantly its soundtrack, enter our lives. “Real Hero” and “Nightcall” headline the apartment soundtrack.
• Halloween and birthdays are celebrated, sink faucets are kicked off, Suffolk is Downed, and a pool table is born. Passive voice is used. One roommate (the guy who works with those moving pictures) creates an amazing window cutout:
• Breaking Bad season four ends and blows our minds. Trick r’ Treat, the campiest, most fun Halloween movie is watched for the third straight year in a 522 to 64 tradition.
• Honestly, I don’t remember (remember) much of Novemeber…
• But we did continue the watching of V for Vendetta on November 5! Oh, and Yelawolf’s Radiactive disappoints, despite “Growing Up in the Gutter” getting regular play.
• There’s a very 64 Christmas, the end of having normal temperatures in the apartment, and the end of the final fall semester at BU, much celebrating doesn’t really ensue.
• Mass hysteria consumes the apartment as Community airs its last episode of the year and goes on hiatus! Lives are lost! Wars are waged! Rent is paid!
• The final semester begins as the pipes burst. The beer fridge is in full force as the back porch lives up to its legend.
• THE GREATEST PHOTOSHOP BATTLE OF ALL TIME BEGINS. With the Patriots and Giants facing each other in the playoffs, no Photoshop job is off-limits. Some wonderful samples…
• We celebrate Valentine’s Day with each other. It is super romantic and Katherine Heigl owns rights to the movie version of it. But seriously, we did have a dinner of 40s and chili and doughnuts.
• The chili and doughnuts are eaten during a viewing of the classic Black Dynamite. The Giants beat the Patriots and one roommate (this guy) decided to start claiming it is hockey season. Oh, and Attack the Block, like Drive, adds more movie soundtrack stylings to the apartment playlist.
• The last spring break that none of us celebrate. We reach the end of our heatless apartment streak. Saving money > freezing our asses off.
• COMMUNITY RETURNS! Lives are lived! Treaties are signed! Rent is still paid! Cinematically, The Raid Redemption raises adrenaline levels everywhere.
• MARATHON MONDAY. The best holiday in Boston lives on at 64, as we celebrate it for the last time as BU students. A beard provides static for the celebratory decorations.
• It was a hit in Canada, but it took until April for Carly Rae Jespen’s “Call Me Maybe” to become the monster in the U.S. that it is today. It can be heard 24/7 at the apartment during this time. But seriously, Red Sox Opening Day was awesome to see in person.
• Kids graduate and become adults. Friends leave. Tears rain down. The apartment gets more crowded.
• The Avengers becomes a thing…
• But is no Moonrise Kingdom.
•And 64 is flooded with sounds of weak neighboring cover bands.
• The apartment really tries to win the “Hottest Apartment Ever” title, discussions of whether you could jump from the porch to the garage also heat up…exciting stuff here.
• The Red Sox disappoint their fans. One roommate (this guy) declares it’s hockey/football/not baseball season. Oh, and the Olympics start up again, as well as our love for Alex Morgan.
• End of days.
• Breaking Bad and Cane’s chicken become a part of the weekly routine. BUT IT’S THE END OF DAYS.
Because of all that, I will always love this apartment. I thank everyone who made it possible, especially cardboard cutout Billy Mays.
And there’s only one way to leave…
Play me out, keyboard cat: